The JUDGE VS THE CRIMINAL

When I was charged as one of the perpetrators for a crime i had been a victim of, I had no criminal record. No cautions, not so much as a speeding ticket. In fact, I had never been arrested before. I had a Grammar school education behind me, an array of qualifications and a university degree. I had never claimed benefits, never applied for council tax discounts, and lived in privately rented accommodation.

I'd had a very strict upbringing. I respected the police, followed the rules, dressed appropriately, and God forbid; never dropped the façade.

It's blindingly obvious why I became an extremely good, functioning drug addict- right?

I stood in court wearing a brand new, very smart suit and almost cried from embarrassment when, as a result of nerves getting the better of me, I addressed the judge as "your majesty".

The judge stared at me aghast and turned to my solicitor, stating;

How am I supposed to prosecute this young woman for heaven's sake?!

By that point in time, I had spent the year being relentlessly harassed, bribed, blackmailed and intimidated by the police. The police had executed a further 6 search warrants on my address to raid my home for drugs. I was under investigation for;

• Conspiracy to supply class-a drugs

• Concern in the supply of class-a drugs

• Possession with intent to supply class-a drugs

• Possession of class-a drugs

• Money laundering

• Child grooming

• Possession and handling of stolen goods

I had multiple counts of the above charges too by the way, not just one of each. But every charge was dropped; because of the simple fact that I was actually innocent!

It was drug raid number 7 when the police found 3 small bags of heroin in a handbag belonging to a friend who had left the bag at mine. Sod's law! I could not prove the handbag didn't belong to me, and because the handbag was in my home, and the 3 bags of heroin were in that handbag- I was charged with possession of class-a drugs.

At the fourth court hearing, after a pre-probational report had been undertaken and the judge could find no other ways of preventing the inevitable, he went nuclear with anger!

This is bloody ridiculous. I shouldn't be prosecuting this young lady! I should be prosecuting the bloody police! This is obscene! This doesn't even warrant so much as a conditional caution, she doesn't even have any prior involvement with the police, let alone a criminal record! WHERE is the DNA and fingerprint evidence found on the handbag and drugs to prove the allegations you're making? DON'T tell me there was no justification for such extreme measures WHEN YOU ARE ABOUT TO RUIN THIS YOUNG WOMAN'S LIFE, BEING FOREVER BLIGHTED WITH A CRIMINAL RECORD!!

The judge turned towards me and asked me if I had anything to say. I did...

Your majesty...er shit no I mean your highness...oh shit, oh fuck I just said shit...OH FUCK I JUST SWORE AT A JUDGE. SHIT!!! Erm...I'd just like to say that I am a drug addict...therefore the likelihood of finding any drugs in my home is slim to none...because I would have consumed those drugs. Do you understand what I'm saying?

The judge lapsed into momentary silence, then replied;

Yes young lady I understand. I've never thought about the matter in this way before. Prosecuting drug addicts for possession of class-a drugs...it is true that you learn something new everyday...today I have learned that THE UK JUSTICE SYSTEM IS A BLOODY JOKE.