I am aware my language is becoming increasingly worse but ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME?!
Yesterday one of the runners left my flat then within seconds the road was filled with police cars, an armed response unit, police dogs barking away and that panicked radio chatter that always signifies they are trying to locate a criminal who’s legged it!
I sat here my heart beating out of my chest with a mixture of intense relief this was over, excitement for my impending freedom but of course; the extreme terror of what consequences would land on my shoulders because of their criminal activities. Especially because I have no proof otherwise apart from a blog, numerous pleas for help through Crimestoppers and the Victim and Witness Support Hub AND praying that they get their facts right using logical reasoning.
Its 23.20 and im in TEARS. I couldn’t carry on writing earlier because my head was spinning. I never got raided in the end. They were after some other person for heaven’s knows what. Not the gang of very obvious, violent drug dealers who’ve mentally, sexually and physically abused a vulnerable woman whilst keeping imprisoned in her own home for over 6 months.
I just took my chance. I submitted my 4th or 5th form to Crimestoppers while the 14 year old CHILD has been sent to deal drugs at someone elses house because I was threatening to call the police on Mr Boss Man. There’s no way I can sit here watching a 14 year old whos also trapped just like me and not snitch; I will take a chance with my life for this one. He’s just a fucking CHILD for God’s sake. And if they stab me or shoot me or do whatever they do to snitches for doing this. Well, im half dead anyway as a result of them and the mental and physical agony they have made me suffer. Even if I dont turn out to be as ill as I think I am. They have broken me mentally anyway. I will never ever get over this experience. The let down. Not having a single fucking person do anything when its GOT to be noticeable that I moved in and disappeared to the neighbours right? Surely? Am I worth absolutely nothing?
Why hasn’t my ‘friend’ and ex boyfriend done ANYTHING? I have asked both of them over the months and got no answers. Just excuses. I am honestly dead inside. Just kill me now.